A Tribute to Janus

I am at an age where looking forward shows little time left – I could be dead in a year for some reason! – and looking back makes me appreciate many of the people I have known and met, things I have done, adventures I have had. Making the best of time left is a major goal, and as Clint Eastwood said, “I wake up every morning and don’t let the old man in.” Let’s change it to “old lady” and take it from there.

I have lived in different parts of the country, mid-west, west coast, east coast, upstate New York. I have taken trips throughout the country, sailed in the British Virgin Islands, been stuck in airports overnight far too many times. Siblings live in Wisconsin and Colorado. Relatives are scattered throughout the country, many I have never met because of my immediate family moving every few months for several years, and we never went back to visit. It makes me sad in some ways, and feel empathy for my mother who was often home alone in a strange community with 4 kids to raise and a husband overseas in some mysterious place for many weeks or months at a time. It wasn’t easy for her, nor us, nor my father – connections that could have been were easily broken.

Sentiment is not something I “do” – broken ties mean just moving on to the next adventure. This is not necessarily a bad thing as being weighed down by the past can be a challenge, but it does bring a sense of disconnect from other people and a lack of willingness to risk a connection that can be severed. Loss is part of it, but there is expectation, too – what lies around the corner? New adventures await!

We are used to long road trips, taking several weeks to travel here and there. They are so fun – sometimes tiring – but there is a certain level of Zen that accompanies them. The time passes differently when confined to a car for hours. What is there to do? I often knit on a mindless project, daydream, chat with Josh, look at the landscape, snap crappy pictures out of the window. Country and towns flash by. Then we stop for 2 or 3 days in a town, explore it, and move on. There are a number of places we would like to visit again, and perhaps we shall.

In a couple of months, we will be taking our first trip overseas. We have been to Canada and Mexico, but in the fall we will be flying to Rekyavik and cruising to Barcelona. Stops on the way include Liverpool, Dublin, A Coruna, Lisbon, Porto, Malaga, Valencia, and then Barcelona. From there we travel to Almunecar to visit friends for a week. Then home.

While I look back on travels, I also look forward. New places to see, different cultures, good friends. This could be our first and last trip to the Old World, but one to certainly treasure and enjoy with memories and pictures and experiences.